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- *while watching Home Alone* 5-year-old: So his family forgot him? Me: Yeah. 5 (panicking): Wait, will you guys ev… twitter.com/i/web/status/1… 2 days ago
- "We have reached a point in the season where this is no longer real life. I am now living in a snow globe filled wi… twitter.com/i/web/status/1… 5 days ago
- Fancy Family Nail Polish Night 💅 https://t.co/5nAhVQ6TQR 1 week ago
- Was about to yell at my elderly dog for stealing a chicken nugget but then realized he's 98 in dog years so instead… twitter.com/i/web/status/1… 1 week ago
- Me yelling at my kids for yelling at me at the playground: "STOP YELLING! I TAUGHT YOU BETTER THAN THAT!" #parenting 1 week ago
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